Capt. Crankypants

SO...TRUMP

Cranky has a question; what the actual ef is wrong with this guy?

Trump's brain hurts.

Did someone hide his meds? Is his mind being consumed by a Jovian brain slug? Seriously, Cranky wants an answer; what is his problem?? Normal thinking people don't behave this way. Normal thinking people are a combination of good and bad impulses. You strive to maximize the good and minimize the bad. Not Trump. His only instincts are all bad. He never chooses the right thing under any circumstances.

Give you an example. If Trump came upon a dog that had been struck by a car and was lying on the side of the road, whimpering, in pain, needing help, select what Trump would most likely do from this list of options:

A- Keep driving and pay it no mind
B- Stop, look, shrug his shoulders then keep driving
C- Stop, get out, piss on its head then keep driving
D- Run over it again as he drove past then flip it the bird
E- Stop, take the animal to a vet and stay with it
F- Anything but E

I've lost count of all the messed up sh*t he's done because it gets added to every day. There's no end to it. He's a liar, cheat, and swindler in an ill-fitting suit and a bad rug. He's achieved a level of corruption that Cranky didn't think was even possible. It would be impressive if it weren't so f**ked up.

And the tweeting! The goddamn idiotic tweeting! Enough already! The Trump administration has made Crany very cranky. We need to regain some measure of normalcy or I'm just gonna have to close myself up into a box til this is over.